Oh the weekends just blend in with the week when you're on maternity leave, I tend to walk around oblivious of the day or date and just get on with things.  This weekend we went raspberry picking, a free pudding to a lunch and so so yummy to cook with.  I also attempted Jamie Oliver's 'Empire Roast Chicken', which was no mean feat.  I generally find that his recipes are easy to follow, but this one didn't really read well but it did look pretty immense and I was after a Sunday dinner that was a little out of the ordinary.  It was beautiful, honestly, the chicken smelt amazing while marinating in the fridge, and the whole thing cooked beautifully.  Both the children devoured it too, which is always a bonus.  I'd definitely cook it again, another successful meal!

I did attempt to make a blackberry and apple pie for pudding, but got as far as making the pastry!  Clearly incapable of multitasking to a great extent!  I'll be finishing off the pie tomorrow, pictures to follow.
Monday morning means it's baby group, off to the park this morning.  The park is a giant sandpit, most of which we seemed to bring home with us!  The house had to be hoovered in the brief window both boys are entertained at bath time, phew!  Park number two this afternoon, and 'O' threw the hugest paddy, what do you do when your child refuses to walk any further?!  I threatened the naughty step, which was clearly implausible, you could nearly see him laughing at me.  I couldn't carry him and push the pushchair.  He was just in a clingy mood.  The little limpet only let go of me to stamp across the bridges 'trip trap' style.  I admit, I find the limpet highly irritating when I'm out and about and manoeuvring the pushchair at the same time, it can be difficult, but really, I also love it.  He always holds my hand when we're walking about, so I know he's with me and safe, and I love him so much, why would I want to let go, or why would I want him to let go?

Mr and me discussed our family at the weekend.  I'm sure it's a conversation most parents of two have at some point, but we're thinking this is it for us baby wise.  I'm going to hate to sell and donate all our baby belongings, my maternity clothes, all the teeny toys and things but we feasibly can't afford to have any more, so these precious baby days are nearly over.  I feel so sad about it.  I feel sad that I'm never going to be pregnant again, feel the baby kick, wriggle or hiccup.  I feel sad that we're not going to have a little girl.  I do though, recognise how lucky we are.  We do have two beautiful, healthy boys.  I know, having had my brother die, that the temptation is to have a 'spare'.  Obviously they wouldn't be 'spare', but I could not be any more grateful to still have a sister, so if the worst did happen to one of my little boys (please no), then at least there would be another little one for the other.  But it is not to be, and like most parents out there, we will hope for the best, every day.  I also think I'd be too fraught with three, I'm pulled at two, and I've never been the most patient or rational of people.  So two it is, at least 'H' won't have the trauma of being a middle child!

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